Can a Goldfish’s Attention Span Save the NBA?

I can confidently assert that not too many things surprise me nowadays. Once a person familiarizes themselves with humanity’s tendencies, thoroughly explained in the Bible and found in the study of history, it is necessary to arrive at the conclusion that history repeats itself.

To clarify, I am no predeterminist and neither am I making the case that all human activity has been foreordained by God. Those whom are familiar with my background understand that my relationship with Calvinism is…how shall I put it? Non-existent, uncordial, icy, hostile even…and I’m attempting to be diplomatic with my description. I digress, slightly.

The point I’m attempting to make is that humanity doesn’t learn from its mistakes. Man doesn’t take the time to look to the past in order to avoid repeating the errors of his ancestors. The end result will be a repetition of historical ills.

This was the invading thought while I read an article detailing that the NBA is attempting to shorten basketball games due to the Millennial generation’s miserable attention spans.

USA Today reported on the occurrence and gave context to the news by alluding to a 2015 study, conducted by Microsoft, which demonstrates that the attention span of the modern society is a paltry eight seconds – less than that of a goldfish. (At the risk of contradicting myself, I must say that the results astounded me. Eight seconds is rather long, considering that I presumed the number would be closer to 2.561 seconds. Still, the findings ought to make marine life proud. Apologies. I digress, again.)

Before the Denver Nuggets/Indiana Pacers game hosted in London a few days ago, NBA Commissioner (and effeminate looking) Adam Silver announced that the league’s competition committee would take a “fresh look” at the length of games once the current season concludes. He cited people’s, “particularly, Millennial’s” diminishing attention spans as the reason for this analysis.

It is imperative to examine this development from an economic standpoint first and then from a moral one; not that the former should receive greater consideration than the latter. Yet, that is exactly the gist of this article: since the league will examine this matter from a fiscal standpoint instead of a moral one, the end result will be a worsening of our already dilapidated social condition.

Deducing from Silver’s statement, it appears as if the league has experienced a decline in revenues. If viewership has waned due to longer games and shorter attention spans, businesses that advertise with the league and networks that broadcast the games will not want to continue to pay the premiums they have for some time now for the exposure. Even though Silver presents the development as an accommodation for and in consideration of the typical viewer, in truth, it is the league’s profits they are seeking to insulate.

Please, do not misunderstand – I am not condemning the NBA for seeking to protect its income. (I’m no disciple of Marx.) What I rebuke is the blatant lie propagated by Silver and the NBA, that the move to shorten games is being considered solely because of the league’s fans. All the opposite is true. If the league primarily has its customer’s interests in mind, they would oppose the move to shorten the games knowing full well that a general lack of attention is a cultural and personal deficiency known as lack of discipline. Shortening games will only add to the societal problem.

Then again, one shouldn’t expect moral and cultural considerations to be on the NBA’s radar. This is the same organization that has allowed its platform to be used for the advancement of militant homosexuality and radical racial politics.

If the NBA decides to acquiesce to modern cultural demands, which includes an incessant push for the conveniences which have made our society lazier and less self-disciplined, expect an increase in our collective intellectual and physical slothfulness. In essence, the NBA will have added to our cultural decline.

Think on it; when a child is granted his every capricious desire and is coddled by his parents, the end result is an indolent, completely dependent, conceited, spoilt being. He does nothing for himself, lacks self-control and believes he deserves everything. Therefore, he becomes enslaved and a burden to the rest of society. This is a microcosm of modern culture – specifically today’s youth. If this wasn’t the case, Adam Silver, the head of one of the world’s most popular sports leagues, wouldn’t be worried about how this generation’s customary sluggishness could potentially affect the future of his league’s profits.

This is all ironic, considering that basketball is a high-energy, constantly moving and scoring sport. One would think that such high-paced movement would attract the attention of easily bored, euphoria dependent Millennials. Then again, this generation has eschewed physical activity altogether due to their being hypnotized with the ever-pervasive, artificial entertainment industry in the form of video games, television shows and movies.

Maybe Silver should concern himself with appealing to goldfish instead of modern Millennials. At least goldfish’s attention spans are guaranteed to remain at eight seconds while the public’s is deteriorating by the second – literally.

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